Each semester is different, and so is this one.
The first 2 weeks were amazing for me; my relationship with Jesus was sweet, open and loving, and I spent most of my days with Him. The school work started and life got a bit more complicated, and that affected my relationship with Jesus.
God’s been showing me my pride a lot, and I’m almost disgusted to see how prideful I can get. We all are, I know that, but I’m glad He’s been showing me the dark side of my heart because now He can humble me enough to change it and make it pure, light and loving.
He’s also surprising me with some things I don’t exactly know what to think about.
I found some bug bites on my left thigh and thought it’s spider that’s biting me, so I checked behind + under my bed to kill it. I didn’t find a spider but I did find some kind of tiny bugs. I killed them but they kept coming, and I kept being bitten. I talked to some people at school and realized they’re probably fleas, even though I don’t know how we got them. I googled them (and I shouldn’t have done that because I found out too many things) and bought some stuff for it. Then I moved my mattress (and I’ve been sleeping in the sick room for a couple of days now), washed + dried all of my clothes, and I’ve been cleaning my bed and floor and carpet every day now. It takes me at least half an hour but I haven’t seen any bugs for 2 days now. Hopefully I got rid of them. I’m not sure how long I’m suppose to clean and spray it for. Do you know anything about fleas? Someone said they may be chiggers but I don’t even want to think about those (they go under your skin and bite you). Bugs are light brown and hard to see but I can still see them on the wall, they jump and there’s not a lot of them (I only found around 10 or 15 of them).
I’m not sure what lesson behind this trial is but fear came out even though I wasn’t scared of fleas before. Is God trying to strengthen my faith? I know He’s Almighty and He can get rid of the bugs in a split second… but why isn’t He? What would He like me to learn? What is this preparation for? Is He going to send me somewhere where there are a lot of bugs and I need to get rid of the fear now?
I’d love it if you would pray for Jesus to remove the bugs, for my fear of them and for His comfort and peace to dwell in my heart. I’ve also been having bad and disturbing dreams, connected to my past, and I’m not sleeping well. There’s a lot of discouragement present as well. We moved my whole room into another room, called “sick room” (for people who get sick) and 3 roommates have been sleeping at pastor’s house, one in another room, and only 2 of us in the sick room. It seems like the enemy is trying to bring division and he’s successful on some parts.
We leave for our 10-day outreaches next Friday, and I’m super excited! We’re in contact with people in Serbia, and they told us we’re going to be a part of an English camp during the week, and over 100 people applied! The church there is experiencing a lot of opposition and that’s a good sign – Satan doesn’t want things to happen because he knows the Light is shinning and drawing people out of the darkness!
I’d love to hear updates of your life as well – sometimes I feel like I live on the other side of the world when I’m only 4 hours away. Let me know how you’re doing, what God’s been doing in your heart and how I can pray for you!
I’ll be trying to update my blog soon again. Until then…
“So I think we should get as much out of life as we possibly can. There is nothing better than to enjoy our food and drink and to have a good time. Then we can make it through this troublesome life that God has given us here on earth.” – Ecclesiastes 8:15
“Work hard at whatever you do. You will soon go to the world of the dead, where no one works or thinks or reasons or knows anything.” – Ecclesiastes 9:10
No comments:
Post a Comment