He's strong when I'm weak.

Elijah was a unique man but no different than all of us. God used him in a big way but Elijah still had ups and downs, he feared and was insecure.
Elijah experienced victory; he prayer, God answered, people responded! He showed people who God really is and that He's the one they should be worshipping!
Right after that, he got a threat from Jezebel, king Ahab's wife, and got scared. He ran away and when he was full of emotions, fear, when he was tired, God took care of him. He sent an angel to touch him, wake him up and feed him. That food was enough for him to live on for 40 days and nights.
When Elijah was weak, he depended on God and that was a perfect way for God to show him how strong He is.

When I was at home during the break, I struggled with feeling responsible to take care of my mom. I felt like I wasn't suppose to leave home, not even for an hour, because that would mean my mom would have an opportunity to say yes to the temptations and weaknesses she has and if she would say yes to them, I would feel guilty for not staying at home, protecting her from all of those things. I put a lot of burden on myself and so many times I felt like a parent to her instead the other way around.
Trying to protect my mom was so hard for me that I fell into a depression because I knew I can't save her but I felt guilty for not saving her, if that makes sense. I shared my struggles with one of the missionary ladies from my church and it was amazing that God »told me« to share those things with her; she went through very similar things when she was younger. She was a real blessing to me, trying to help me and tell me that it's not up to me to save my mom, that Jesus is the only one that can do that. It's so funny that I knew all of the things she was telling me but I still didn't surrender my mom, I didn't offer her on the altar and ask Jesus to save her. I did pray and I asked Jesus to save her but I had to surrender myself to Him as well and admit that I can't have things under control, that I can't save my mom, that I can't say »no« to her temptations instead of her.
At the end of the break, maybe a week before I came back to College, I was sitting in my room, trying to pray (it was really hard for me to pray about my mom and her situation because that made me think about it and I didn't really want to do that) and at one point I got it. I realized that I can't always be listening carefully to hear if my mom will open herself a bottle of wine, I can't always be listening to hear her going on the balcony to secretly smoke when we all know she does that, I can't always be listening and be ready to stop her + help her not to do things because it's up to her and I'm not her saviour! She's not 5 years old and she's not my child; she's my mom and she's 56 years old. She's old enough to decide for herself and the only thing I can do for not being imprisoned with her is to pray for her and ask God to show me or tell me if I can do anything else. But otherwise, it's not my burden, it's not my responsibility. That doesn't mean I don't care for my mom, that I don't love her… it hurts so bad and I would do anything for my family to get saved! But I'm not the one who's going to save them, Jesus is!

Elijah prayed to God, told Him he's tired and he showed his weakness. He gave an opportunity to God to show him His strenght.
When I gave up on being my mom's guardian and savior, when I surrended myself and my mom to God, that's when God put peace in my heart and was my comfort. I know He's my mom's Savior, I know He's still waiting for her to choose Him, He promised that to me. And even though He didn't show His strenght in saving her yet, I know He has His own perfect timing and He's going to do it. I just pray my mom's heart would be open, soft and willing to trust the Lord because He really is the only one that can help her.